Now for another 20 years of togetherness

I had hoped to write about Tonio Fenech’s new scheme for attracting foreigners to buy property in Malta. I honestly think that topic can wait.

Saviour Balzan 22 September 2011, 12:00am

6 min read

Nobody can beat Austin Gatt when it comes to arrogant quips.

He said that the Nationalist will reign for another 20 years. And he said this at the granaries: the Floriana location that attracts Nationalist diehards who continue to believe that they should rule for yet another 20 years.

Now that is something that – if uttered in another part of this small world – would lead to recriminations and accusations. This indecent proposal leads me to suggest that Lawrence should do away with democracy and immediately announce the setting up of a one-party state.

As a one-party state, one would decide once and for all to eradicate all the press apart from the In-Nazzjon and The Times. All journalists will be sent to a rehabilitation camp and administered drugs to come in line. The internet will be filtered and only bloggers who adulate Gonzi and have constantly abused any of the Prime Minister’s opponents will be allowed to operate. They would be allowed to express opinions and untruths with impunity.

George Abela will not be replaced, and the Presidency will be abolished. From the first day of one-party rule, the department of contracts will be replaced with a registry of all those companies that can be chosen to carry out projects.

Zaren Vassallo's firm will be given preference over all those companies which have shown interest in being on this list. Other companies that donate more than €65,000 will be allowed to partner up with Zaren Vassallo. All donations will be coordinated by Joe Saliba.

All projects related to marketing and audio-visual activities will be awarded automatically to Where’s Everybody?

It shall be unlawful to laugh at or ridicule the Prime Minister, and anyone caught giggling or demeaning the PM will be liable for up to six months imprisonment.

The post of the leader of Opposition will be retained, but he would not be able to occupy his post unless approved by the Prime Minister. Preferably, he must be someone who appears Labourite but is in fact only superficially red – a fine choice would be Joe Mifsud.

Political parties will be tolerated, and can organise coffee mornings every Sunday morning and Wednesday evening.

The Prime Minister will appoint a board of wise men. It will consist of, first and foremost, the shrewdest men on the island. They will be chosen on the premise of their humility, altruism and frugal lifestyle. Vince Farrugia will head the board, together with Eddie Aquilina, Joe (Peppi) Azzopardi, Peter Darmanin and Mgr. Anton Gouder. Joe Mizzi will be company secretary.

All foreign embassies will be closed – apart from the embassy in the Vatican and the one in Brussels – and Pippo Psaila will be chosen as Malta’s ambassador to the Vatican. Richard Cachia Caruana – who now spends more time in Malta than in Brussels – will be replaced by David Casa, who is the only Maltese who still loves the Brussels way of life.

The new way of doing politics will also seek to change the inconsistencies that have led people to sacrifice their political career.

Pierre Portelli will be allowed to continue with his breakfast show and then stand as ‘Truth’ minister – a political post determined by the man’s remarkable ability in saying the truth when it is a lie. His partner at PBS (Joe Mifsud) will be asked to leave and instead, someone will be roped in to ‘balance out’ the programme. The person earmarked for the job must surely be someone who could act as a foil for Portelli’s PN leanings. That person is undoubtedly Lou Bondì – someone who has over the years shown his immense respect for the truth, and who has distanced himself from partisan politics.

The new one-party state will also endeavour to ensure that the judiciary act in a fair way. To ensure that the judiciary – which is already appointed by the government – acts appropriately, they must swear allegiance to the party and the leader.

To eradicate red tape, all those cases against the government will be declared nolle prosequi.

The 20-point system will be introduced once again. The point systemwill not be the same one introduced in the 1970s by the Mintoff government, but by the national socialists in 1933. Which means, basically, that the points will be awarded depending on a number of factors.

If your parents are Nationalists, that makes for one point. If you live in a Nationalist neighbourhood, that is another point. If you buy In-Nazzjon, that is one point and if you buy the Times that is another point. If you donate €5 a month to the party, that is another point, and if you give information about those who giggle at or mock the leader, that is two points.

The point system could work against you of course. For example, if you ever had a divorce or even simply spoke in favour of it, you will lose a point. Also, if you ever mixed or had anything to do with one of the following people, you will lose two points: (a) Joe Debono Grech; (b) Rita Law; (c) Manwel Cuschieri; (e) Jason Micallef.

If anyone happens to remember that it was Joe Debono Grech who said the famous words: ‘dan is-seklu ghalina’ (‘this century is for us’), that’s another four points.

Those citizens with only eight points or less will have to queue when requiring medical assistance, unless the person involved is in a coma. Those with only eight or less points will not be eligible to enter University. Those with only eight or less will not be issued a passport. Those with only one point or less cannot vote for the Prime Minister every seven years.

To ensure a clear distinction between those who are appreciative of this government and those who are not, those who continue to oppose the goodness of the Prime Minister and the benevolence of the State will be asked to attach a hammer and sickle to their clothes, so as to identify themselves in public. Those who refuse to respect this rule will be transferred to the Safi barracks.

Education will be free for all those who have more than 10 points. In the education system, the following subjects will not be taught: philosophy, psychology, French, history, biology, accounts and law.

The only two obligatory subjects will be religion and home economics.

All classrooms will have a bust of the Prime Minister and the famous words: “People will trust us again, one election after another for at least for another 20 years” emblazoned under it.

And next to it, the name of the person who coined these words.

AUSTIN GATT!

Founder and co-owner of MaltaToday, Saviour Balzan has reported on Maltese politics and...

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Ghadni niftakar lil ex ministru laburista Lorry Sant jghid li l-partit laburista ghandu cens perpetwu fil gvern, waqt dibattitu politiku televiziv. Kullhadd jaf kemm ilu f-oppozizjoni il labour party min dak inhar il hawn. Dr.Gatt taghmiliex tal profeta bhal Lorry Sant ghax l-istorja ghanda habta li tirrepeti ruhha.

Micheal Bonanno •

@Briffy "The same way that the Germans and the Italians keep reminding the young generation of the dark Hitler and Mussolini days". Isn't this what the PN is doing today? Or as it's often said, that what the PN does and say, is good, and what the PL does and say is bad, sorry evil? Briffy, look into the mirror and swear to yourself, that what you utter here everyday is the truth and nothing but the truth. Then go to church and have a full confession.

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Bertu Dimech...kemm int tad-dahk, Imhabbat il-boy! Mela x'taghmel qalb ta' qalbi ...jaqaw qed taghsar l-gheneb; nahseb tajjeb biex tghaffeg! Idboq fommok ghax taghmel izjed figura. Biex tkun court jester trid tkun intelligenti. Int l-anqas ghal-Labour m'int tajjeb. Ciao.

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For beefy..just a quicky. You wrote: The same way that the Germans and the Italians keep reminding the young generation of the dark Hitler and Mussolini days. Is that why the PN organised the infamous Gakketta Blu Buddies (Camicia Nera) to enrich our young generations by destabilizing the the administration of the time? Rest assured, you don't need to bother about reminding our youngsters of the mess that subsequent pn administrations left on the country's sustainable development, especially the environment and the finances. They are already carrying the heavy burden of debt and will keep on doing so for many and many years to come!

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@briffy This is the last, and I mean final, comment. I have better things to do and will not waste more time on an evidently PN die hard. You can join Austin Gatt and iz-Zubina (a tug and criminal) in their arrogance and violent tactics.

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@ Briffy Coming from a family of six children of modest means I know what hardship and problems my father had to face to pay my school fees and purchase my schoolbooks. I am still grateful to this day for the decision by Agatha Barbara to abolish Lyceum fees and provide us with free textbooks. To be fair I am just as grateful to the PN minister of education who I believe was Paris or Borg Olivier who abolished UNiversity fees and permitted me to complete my tertiary education. Rather than paint the other side all black and ours as pure white let us give credit to those public spirited politicians of either party who did good and condemn those rogues who existed and will continue to exist in either party.

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I am a labourite and proud of it. I am proud of the LP history.I am a labourite and am proud of it.

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@Bertu Dimech...It was the Strickland party that worked hardest to provide better education facilities before WW2.The Labour party at that time was just a fledgeling. Laferla did alot to improve the level of education, so did Dandria.. So where does Labour come into all this? Let's not start talking about the 1970s and 80s; everybody who lived through those dark ages knows what happened. It's nauseating even to think about what the Labour regime did. We must mention it soleley to remind people to be vigilant so as not to commit the same mistake that their ancestors did in 1971.The same way that the Germans and the Italians keep reminding the young generation of the dark Hitler and Mussolini days. We only remember the past so that we ensure that they will be no have any repeats. It's understandable for Labour to do their utmost to bury their shameful past, but it still haunts them. Labourites to this day are still ashamed of their past and would like to rewrite Malta's history. However what's done is done. No one can erase it. It's a pity that today's movement is once again harbouring several characters who formed part of Mintoff's cabinet who were welcomed back to the fold after Alfred Sant had managed to kick them out when he was Labour's leader. We have heard remarks by these people to the effect that the 70s and 80s were Labour's glorious days. The Labour movement should dissociate itself from these elements and their remarks like it does whenever KMB opens his mouth. But so far this hasn't happened; indeed the preparation of Labour's manifesto for 2013 has been entrusted to one of these. Plus ca change plus etes la meme chose, Evarist Bartolo once remarked and he was right.

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If Malta was a democracy, Austin Gatt would be in prison. Listen Maltatoday - why is it that every time i write 'Austin Blow-it out-your-Ass Gatt' my post gets censored? Its describes the corrupt SOB perfectly.

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Your article gives a detailed outlook of the workings and proceedings of the current administration and it's thugs and accurately compares them to the political situation in North Korea and Iran. The current situation where a good percentage of the population neither believes nor trusts the current administration was brought by Gonzi himself. The prime minister always diverts or tries to divert because no one believes him any longer all criticism and directs this criticism on the leader of the opposition or on other opponents. The prime minister depicts himself and his administration as infallible and above any mistake or misconduct. The prime minister thinks he has a plausible answer for everything but little does he realize that the people have lost faith in his administration long ago.

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So let me tell you Prof. Briffy, that I remember the 80's very well, and so I am not impressed by the, yes lie machine at tal-pieta', I know perfectly what happened then. It is what the PN wanted and it was their strategy to put the Labour government in the darkest light possible. The MLP fell into this trap. The PN did not work for peaceful solutions, isn't it very strange how all the bombs and trouble stopped instantly the moment the PN went to power. Your analysis is flawed to say the least, how do you explain the slimmest of majorities for the PN in 2008, when the people were supposed to be more educated with a higher proportion of graduates? Your assessment of the MT survey is also wrong, but perhaps you're not aware that majority of university students come from nationalist strong holds. The brilliant education system we have after 23 years of PN rule, is missing out on the inner harbour and southern zones of the island. Very few students make it to university from these areas. Again, your historical knowledge is (like the PN's) cut short at the 80's. Rewind to the 30's-50's period and you will be surprised to learn which party battled to achieve FREE education for ALL, voting rights for men of all social strata and especially voting right for WOMEN. Go on enlighten me with your immense wisdom!

George Zammit •

HomeNewsSportsBlogsWhat's onFood & travelVideoArchivesFollow us on: Facebook Twitter Advertising rates Newspapers. Saviour BalzanThursday, September 22, 2011 Now for another 20 years of togetherness I had hoped to write about Tonio Fenech’s new scheme for attracting foreigners to buy property in Malta. I honestly think that topic can wait. "Nobody can beat Austin Gatt when it comes to arrogant quips". Look who's talking.

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Oh! by the way Briffy, "The last of the Mohicans" would do you good bed time reading!

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Briffy I am pretty sure that you work with Austin Gatt :)

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So Austin Gatt predicts another 20 years of PN rule! Will Arriva still be ruling the roads? The excitement of the new bus service put into place is over..if there ever was any, given that the whole project got off to a bad start! The situation goes from bad to worse. Route 91 is often a shambles. This morning (22 sept) a bus from Marsascala arrived at Fgura around11.15 and was packed with passengers like sardines. Of course, two to three trips were rolled into one. People had been on the stage for half an hour waiting for a bus which was meant to pass every 10 minutes or so we are told. The number was either 416 or 146 - cannot remember correctly. What I do remember is the driver telling the arriva rep on board " dawn nitfughhom gewwa?"(meaning: make them move back) - he was referring to people not sardines! Then he yells at a foreigner in English to 'get back' with no 'please' tagged on, of course! To make matters worse, a complaint by a woman made in a soft tone provokes an outburst from the arriva youngster (barely in his late teens) who threatens her with making her alight from the bus! So much for service with a smile. But it gets worse on the Bombi (Port des Bombes) stage around 17.15 (i.e on the return journey). It takes 45 minutes for a 91 bus to arrive from Valletta. We are told that a 91 bus leaves Valletta every 10 minutes, drivers say 15 but once again we are left waiting for 45 minutes with the 91 bus turning up around 6pm after many on the stage were there by 5.15. The same thing happened last week. Needless to say the bus was jam packed with little if any AC on and it was steaming hot. Is the service really being monitored? Are we back to the old ways in terms of driver -customer relations. Will we have another 20 years of this? It's bad enough that the routes have been mucked up by some upstart who probably never got on a bus in recent years. Are we going to have more of the same being promised - a first class service - when such shoddy treatment is being offered instead. Trouble is these cases overshadow the positive things about the service. Not all is bad. There is a modicum of professionalism being introduced, most of the bus-drivers, unlike the one I came across this morning and his Arriva colleague, are courteous and do a good job and of course the buses are infinitely better than the previous ones . However standards have been slipping too early because of the actions of some who do not know any better and give the service a bad name. The sooner they are weeded out the better. Minister Gatt, if you want another twenty years in power take heed of what is happening on the ground and tell Arriva to monitor such routes as the 91 one better. It is little things like these which get people hot under the collar. This has the potential of being a good service but is being spoilt by some. Take action asap and make sure established times are being kept- if it is meant to be one bus every 10 minutes then we should not wait from 30 to 45 minutes - weed out those who act unprofessionally and in a rude manner (they are a handful) and revise the routes. And make sure that all the facilities like AC are fully availed of. In doing so, make sure that not everyone is tarred with the same brush. Most drivers are deserving of a 'thank you.' But some deserve to be on their bike! southern commuter

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So Austin Gatt predicts another 20 years if PN rule. Will Arriva still be ruling the roads. The fanfare of the new bus service put into place is over..if it ever started! The situation gets from bad to worse. Route 91 is often a shambles. This morning (22 sept) a bus from Marsascala attived at Fgura around11.15 and was packed with passengers like sardines. Of course, two to three trips were rolled into one. People had been on the stage for half an hour waiting for a bus which was meant to pass every 10 minutes or so we are told. The number was either 416 or 146 - cannot remember correctly. What I do remember is the driver telling the arriva rep on board " dawn nitfughhom gewwa?"(meaning: make them move back) - he was referring to people not sardines! Then he yells at a foreigner in English to 'get back' with no 'please' tagged on, of course! To make matters worse, a complaint by a woman made in a soft tone provokes an outburst from the arriva youngster (barely in his late teens) who threatens her with making her alight from the bus! So much for service with a smile. But it gets worse on the Bombi (Port des Bombes) stage around 17.15 (i.e on the return journey). It takes 45 minutes for a 91 bus to arrive from Valletta. We are told that a 91 bus leaves Valletta every 10 minutes, drivers say 15 but once again we are left waiting for 45 minutes with the 91 bus turning up around 6pm after many on the stage were there by 5.15. The same thing happened last week. Needless to say the bus was jam packed with little if any AC on and it was steaming hot. Is the service really being monitored? Are we back to the old ways in terms of driver -customer relations. Will we have another 20 years of this? It's bad enough that the routes have been mucked up by some upstart who probably never got on a bus in recent years. Are we going to have more of the same being promised - a first class service - when such shoddy treatment is being offered instead. Trouble is these cases overshadow the positive things about the service. Not all is bad. There is a modicum of professionalism being introduced, most of the bus-drivers, unlike the one I came across this morning and his Arriva colleague, are courteous and do a good job and of course the buses are infinitely better than the previous ones . However standards have been slipping too early because of the actions of some who do not know any better and give the service a bad name. The sooner they are weeded out the better. Minister Gatt, if you want another twenty years in power take heed of what is happening on the ground and tell Arriva to monitor such routes as the 91 one better. It is little things like these which get people hot under the collar. This has the potential of being a good service but is being spoilt by some. Take action asap and make sure established times are being kept- if it is meant to be one bus every 10 minutes then we should not wait from 30 to 45 minutes - weed out those who act unprofessionally and in a rude manner (they are a handful) and revise the routes. And make sure that all the facilities like AC are fully availed of. In doing so, make sure that not everyone is tarred with the same brush. Most drivers are deserving of a 'thank you.' But some deserve to be on their bike!

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Prosit Saviour, artikolu validissimu, pungenti u fih x'tghomod. Il-Poplu sovran u dment li ma jqarqux bih bhal ma ghamlu f'mill-anqas zewg elezzjonijiet imghoddija (ta' 1998, u 2008 - tat-2003 minhabba l-fattur Ewropa mhux misruqa wkoll ghalkemm illum hafna qeghdin jiddubitaw minn kemm din l-ghazla kienet wahda ghaqlija wara kollox) jaf x'ghandu jaghmel bil-vot. Bil-hnizrijiet tal-passat u bid-dizastri tal-lum, il-poplu ma jridx ikompli jiftaqqar, hu u pajjizu, filwaqt li min imexxih u ta' madwaru jistanew u jithanzru. Il-premessa ta' l-anqas xitan fost ix-xjatten (lesser of two evils) assolutament ma hiex accettabli. Il-poplu ma jridx xjatten immexxuh (evils) u jekk lil min jivvotta jirrizulta li jkun xitan, il-poplu zgur ma jergax jivvotalu l-elezzjoni ta' wara. Dik hi d-demokrazzija vera, id-demokrazzija f'sahhita. Min skada jrid jaghmel l-ispazzju ghal haddiehor u dan irid joghqod attent li ma jiskaddix malajr. Meta jiskadi hu ukoll irid jinbidel. Dik tissejjah alternanza. Anke f'semplici ufficju jkun hemm bzonnha l-alternanza biex jinzammu l-kontrolli. Il-hazin mhux postu fil-gvern.

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Bertu Dimech...I don't need to read the history of Malta during the Labour administration. Unfortunately I and many many others lived through it and had to lump it because there was no way one could critise the doings of the regime unless one was prepared to become a martyr. Maybe you were lucky enough to have been born after 1987 and therefore you assume that Malta was always a democratic country with an congenial economic and social climate. Or if you were around you are suffering from amnesia.Or worse still you are in denial or your love for your country does not come before your love for the party. 'Lie machine' you say. It's a good thing that the majority are not as stupid as people of your ilk and they know what's good for them and for the country...like when they voted for EU accession and when they voted for PN in 1981, 1987, 1992, 1998, 2003, and 2008. Since now there are more people with a tertiary level of education and they can analyse and know which side their bread is buttered on, the chances of Labour winning the next elections are remote. Progressively as the level of education goes up less and less people will vote Labour. Just have a look at the report on the MT survey conducted recently. Maybe you might learn something.

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Maybe Austin Powers Gatt is right that the P.N. makes another 20 years in power........if the outdated I.D.Cards issue not be tackled austin gatt is right.... I think that this issue of the outdated I.D.Cards some over then 10 years STINKS VERY BAD

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Saviour brilliant article and rubbed briffy the very had way. He thinks everyone is a PN lap dog, like the people you mentioned above. Briffy, what the hell do you know about the PL? Do you spent time at the CNL? All you know is what the lie machine at tal-pieta' churn our. Always the same ancient tune, 'Labour hasn't change'. You and the PN have to refer to events that happened over 30 years ago, when JM was a toddler. You can spend time watching storja ta' (nofs) poplu and stop writing crap here.

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@briffy We all know that Augustin enjoys provoking PL. But "extremly intelligent"...???...nah.

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briffy meta issimmi lill austin gatt semmi il hdura li ghandu ghal haddiem kemm laburist u kemm nazzjonalist

Micheal Bonanno •

@briffy. As usual trying to paint your darling PN is good light and depicting the PL in a bad light. We all know that the PN is in a downhill drive, and the writing is on the wall. But you persist in defending the indefensible. Dalwaqt ituk Gieh ir-Repubblika!

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Saviour...the article provides good material for a fairytale but unfortunately it's out of point. Austin is not the mug he looks. He is extremely intelligent and a born teaser. He knows his remarks will result in a lot of sparks from the Labour camp. And he enjoys provoking Labour, probably in retaliation for their behaviour when they were in power. I'm sure the atmosphere pervading in the Hal Far counting hall in 1981 is still very fresh in his memory.As DCG pointed out perhaps the translator used the word 'will' instead of 'should'. But it is an undenial fact that PN has always delivered the goods, not least during the past three ddifficult years of global recession and fincial crises. Austin is right to imagine that all the people endowed with an iota of common sense would not vote Labour or abstain. Apart from the diehard labourites who have only labour genes in their DNA, one has to be a real masochist to help Labour come to power. One must keep in mind that the party hasn't changed; electing a young, inexperienced, and innocuous leader, changing the party flag, changing its name to movement doesn't mean anything if the old guard are back in the fold and are the ones leading the pack.This is not a question of 'better the devil you know.....' the electorate is aware of both devils, so it's a question of one choosing the lesser evil which no one can deny that it is the most sensible solution in life.

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9+...you just forgot to mention the water and electricity bills, Saviour!