The birthstrikers generation

The latest Eurostat data shows Malta already has the lowest fertility rate in Europe and is forecast to continue shrinking. Many of our politicians and sociologists are calling Malta’s plummeting birth rate ‘jaw-dropping’, but perhaps it is an understandable consequence of the existential malaise many of us feel.

There is a growing sense that accountability has been eroded, inequality is rampant and the profound structural changes we need to feel better about the future are out of our reach. There will be those who consider child-free adults unnatural and cold. Many childless people are indeed just as happy as if they were parents.

The climate crisis has presented an opportunity to rebrand being child-free, once the greatest taboo, into the ultimate altruistic act. At the same time, parenthood is framed as the ultimate investment in a better future. But choosing to have children is neither inherently good nor selfish, and the same goes for being child-free. We must challenge the orthodoxy that says choosing to live one way is a criticism of another.

Those who choose to be childless should not be made to feel guilty for their choice. The no-kids movement is booming, but so is the backlash. While deciding against having children is nothing new, a trend towards owning the ‘child-free’ label and discussing that choice more openly is picking up pace. However, societal acceptance and understanding of the choice to live without kids is shifting at a much slower pace.

We must not forget those adults who don’t currently have any children but want them in the future, or adults who had hoped to have children but were unable to (usually labelled ‘childless’). Childless people may have faced fertility challenges or other medical issues or been affected by social circumstances, such as not meeting a suitable or willing partner at the right time, for instance.

The term ‘child-free’ has existed since the early 1900s, although it wasn’t until the 1970s that feminists began using it more widely as a way of denoting women who were voluntarily childless as a distinct group. The suffix ‘free’ was chosen to capture the sense of freedom and lack of obligation felt by many of those who had voluntarily decided not to have kids.

Yet many keep lumping all people who don’t have children into the same group. This doesn’t reflect the very different experiences and feelings of child-free and childless people. It could mean there’s a lack of long-term comparative data looking specifically at either group.

A growing number of adults in our tiny and overpopulated country may be actively choosing not to have kids.

The main reason could be that they don’t want to have children, rather than more circumstantial factors such as medical issues or not wanting to raise a child without having a partner. Other reasons millennials and Gen Zers are choosing to be child-free are wide-ranging, although there are several common trajectories.

Some people know early in life that they don’t want children, and they never waver. Some people come to the decision later in life and then proclaim it as a part of their identity. And then some people are sort of on the fence about whether to have children who might flip-flop back and forth.

Some never really see themselves as likely future parents, feeling a total absence of any maternal yearning to procreate. Others believe having kids would make it more challenging for them to travel or work abroad in the future. Others, still, might list climate change and the state of the country as external factors that influence their reasoning, reflecting a small but growing trend identified by child-free researchers.

Practical and financial issues like living in insecure rental accommodation, working in the gig economy and limited access to healthcare may also be pertinent for many millennials as they weigh up whether to have children. They are uncertain about becoming parents and are stopping to question what exactly those kinds of “sacrifices” might look like, in contrast to previous generations, who may have been more likely to follow societal norms and start a family anyway.

Increased awareness of the potential physical and mental toll of starting a family is also having an influence, and whether people live near their family of origin or friends network is also definitely a factor.

The boom in influencers and online communities celebrating being child-free is, on the one hand, an indication that societal norms are shifting. The sheer number of people going online and finding others who share their perspectives is notable. People are loud and proud about it because it’s become something that’s increasingly less taboo.

The pandemic may also have played a role, as public discussions about the challenges faced by many parents came to the fore. As parents began talking openly about their struggles with homeschooling, nursery closures or simply managing basic living expenses due to the economic impact of COVID-19, it provided a safer backdrop for talking about the advantages of being childless.

Still, there is a bit of pressure that if you’re not having children, you have to be off living this wonderful, glamorous or philanthropic life, or that you have to go off and do something significant.

The worrying fact remains that more and more couples would rather not have kids and regret it later than have kids and regret it later. In the meantime, pets are becoming the new “children” for many couples these days.